Sunday, December 26, 2010

walk

Tonight it was a bit warmer here, which means it was above freezing.  So I took a walk intending to have some phone time with some friends, but as luck would have it (which isn't luck at all) it all went to voicemail.  So I took off the earbuds and looked up and saw a most beautiful sky filled with low-flying brown clouds interspersed between a perfectly clear starry sky.  It was amazing.  Snow everywhere.  Beautiful lights.  It was a real scene. It was a scene I won't get when I go back to Texas so I wanted to soak it in.

The real amazing part was the wind.  It's no secret that I really don't like the wind most of the time.  But tonight I loved it.  It was refreshing and cold and reminded me of all the walks I used to take when I was in Ohio.  Cold walks around the pond next to the music building.  There were times when I'd be going crazy in my office with work and needed to cool off and take a walk.  At the moment they were a necessity, now I look back as they were a privilege.  I don't have a place like that in Texas.

Bowling Green is windy.  That old walk around the pond was usually windy as the music building is at the edge of campus and there was a flat across the street that the wind would blow across.  It was kind of a wind tunnel.  The wind tonight took be back to that place.  It was beautiful.

I started to pray and talk to God.  I just felt so thankful for him and all that he has done for me.  He has brought me so far along in my walk with him, only by his grace alone.  It really is a privilege to follow Jesus.  I used to have this attitude of pride in that "I chose him and what a score that is for him because I'm awesome" kind of thing.  Most days he has broken me of that (I still have my days!) and he's shaping me more and more into a servant of him for his glory only.

It's hard not to miss some of my time in Ohio, especially the first few years, those hard years of growing in faith and in academics.  I grew a lot in those years, they were full of confusion, love, pain, fear, with good community and fellowship.  I made a lot of good friends, joined my first church, joined in some leadership, made a lot of music, and really began to let God work through me.

Sometimes I long for those times, but more and more I don't long for them so much but am happy they happened and when I'm reminded of them to be thankful of that time that God gifted me with.

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